10 Practical Tips From one First Time Mom to Another

As I reflect upon the past 11 weeks of being home with my baby boy, I thought I would share some of the valuable lessons that I have learned along the way. Some of these little pearls of wisdom were shared with me during my pregnancy and others I discovered myself during my postpartum experience. Here are my top 10 tips for fellow first time moms:

1. ​Pack your hospital bag with whatever you think will help you the most.​ I could share what I packed, or you can look up one of the many helpful lists available on the web, but know you don’t need an exhaustive list. Bring the items that will make you and your spouse feel the most comfortable, prepared, and at ease as you welcome your baby into this world. I would recommend looking at a few different lists for common themes or unique ideas you might not have thought of otherwise! For me, that was towels from home for that first glorious post baby shower.
   
2. Have some postpartum supplies ready. Unless you know in advance because of a specific medical reason, you never know exactly when or how your baby will come into this world, but it doesn’t hurt (no pun intended) to be prepared. I did not know if I was going to have a vaginal birth or a c-section, but I wanted to be semi prepared either way. I purchased a few key postpartum products like Tucks pads and extra strength Tylenol, and was given maxi pads and some disposable underwear from a cousin who had recently had a baby. I also purchased one daytime and nighttime nursing bra, not knowing in advance if I’d be able to breastfeed long term, and some maternity underwear that were designed for either a vaginal birth or c section. Once my baby was born, I invested in additional products that greatly helped me in those early weeks after I knew what I actually needed. View and shop my breastfeeding and postpartum essentials here!
3. Take home the hospital freebies.
   Whatever they give you, bring it home—diapers, wipes, swaddles, feeding syringes, the donut, postpartum supplies, etc. You’re paying for all of these things eventually anyway! Also, don’t be afraid to ask your nurse for more either and don’t feel guilty. I did this on our last day in the hospital, and got a fresh set of all my postpartum supplies to take home. This allowed me to have what I really needed in multiple places when we first got home.
4. Speaking of the donut, ask for it. Ladies, trust me on this one: if you have a vaginal birth, the donut will become your BFF. Shortly after delivery and as the pain medication was wearing off, simply sitting up in the hospital bed was uncomfortable for me. When I brought this up to my nurse during one of her rounds and asking about my current pain level, she asked if I wanted to try using the donut to help take the pressure off—literally. I said yes, so she brought me an inflatable one and it helped me tremendously. I used this in bed, while I was nursing, and everywhere I sat down so as to not irritate an already sensitive area. I think this also helped my healing process significantly.
5. Utilize a lactation consultant. Even if you’ve taken a breastfeeding course prior to delivery, you don’t really know what you’re doing until your baby is here and you can practice together. That is why it’s so helpful to ask to see the lactation consultant shortly after delivery. I did this in the hospital more than once and it helped me build a proper foundation for feeding my baby. Then, after you get home and your milk comes in, go see lactation again. I can’t recommend this enough. It’s quite different once your milk actually comes in and your baby starts feeding more and longer. Seeing lactation early could also prevent poor latch issues, nipple or breast pain and complications that can arise, and growth problems with your baby. I didn’t do this when we got home, and had a tough time with feeding my baby several weeks later because we learned he wasn’t transferring milk efficiently and was still hungry all the time. After seeing the lactation consultant a few times for a few weeks, our problems resolved, baby was gaining weight properly again, I was healing, and we could finally take a deep breath.
6. Be honest with your doctors, nurses, and spouse. Don’t try to be a hero and say everything is okay when you feel like it isn’t. Whether that is physical pain, emotional exhaustion, or whatever it may be, no one will think less of you because you admitted that you’re hurting or are anxious and worried about something. You just grew, carried, and birthed a tiny human into this world!! This will also be a good practice to start to help with any postpartum anxiety or depression you may experience.
7. Stock your freezer ahead of time. This was an idea I had later in my third trimester. I asked my mom if she would be willing to come visit for a weekend and help me stock my freezer with some delicious, homemade frozen meals. She was and she did. Not only did we have a fun weekend together cooking in the kitchen and spending time together just us, we made several batches of our favorite meals like chilis, soups, and meatballs that would be ready for us to thaw and reheat when we needed an easy meal. This was great for the nights when we didn’t have a meal train meal, didn’t want to order takeout again, and didn’t have the time, hands, or energy to muster something up for dinner.
8. Set up a meal train. If someone hasn’t offered to set one up for you, you could always use mealtrain.com and set one up for yourself. That way, when someone asks how they can help in those early days and weeks, you can send them the personal link to your train, and they can assist you in a tangible way.
9. Accept help (and don’t be afraid to ask for it either). Whether that is bringing you (or your spouse) coffee or a meal in the hospital, or watching your pets, or coming over to hold the baby while you shower or take a nap, say yes when someone offers to help. I know it’s hard to not feel like you’re taking advantage of people, but I promise you’re not. If they’re reaching out and offering, then they’re likely very happy to do it!
10. Let go. There are certain things in your life that you are simply going to have to let go of, at least during the early days and weeks during the transition to a family of three. For me, that was letting go of modesty (lol) in the hospital, expectations I’d set for myself like staying on top of work emails and having a clean house or at least a clean kitchen, or letting friends see me without my hair done and makeup on. Sometimes, just showering and putting on a clean shirt that didn’t have leaked breast milk or spit up on it was a huge success. These things don’t matter nearly as much as the health of you, your baby, and your family, and you will have time to do them again eventually! It does get easier.

I hope these tips are helpful for you as they were for me, and make this special time in your life a little bit smoother.

Love,
​
Kimberly